{"id":4510,"date":"2022-09-04T15:58:44","date_gmt":"2022-09-04T15:58:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/2022\/09\/04\/to-be-known-based-on-psalm-1391-6-13-18-and\/"},"modified":"2022-09-04T15:58:44","modified_gmt":"2022-09-04T15:58:44","slug":"to-be-known-based-on-psalm-1391-6-13-18-and","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/2022\/09\/04\/to-be-known-based-on-psalm-1391-6-13-18-and\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201cTo Be Known\u201d\tbased on Psalm 139:1-6, 13-18 and Philemon 1:1-21"},"content":{"rendered":"

For
\nyears now, the book of Philemon has tickled my funny bone. \u00a0That fact
\nis now making me squirm. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

It
\nmade me laugh cause I read it from a logical perspective, and I was
\namused by the choice of argument style. \u00a0I thought it was
\nmanipulative, but brilliant. \u00a0From this angle, the line \u201cFor this
\nreason, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do your
\nduty, \u00a0yet I would rather appeal to you on the basis of love–and I,
\nPaul, do this as an old man, and now also as a prisoner of Christ
\nJesus\u201d is potent. \u00a0Paul points out his power, steps back from it,
\nbut then adds layers of guilt about his age and his position as a
\nprisoner to strengthen his claim that what he wants should be given
\nto him \u201cfreely.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Taken
\nfrom a pure logic perspective, it is a strong argument, and indeed
\nmanipulative.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

But
\nI wonder what made me take it from a logic perspective.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Because
\nwhen I read it now, it sounds like it is an honest emotional appeal.
\nThe gist is that Paul has come to love and depend on Onesimus. \u00a0Paul
\nwould like to have Onesimus with him, but decides that the right
\nthing to do is let Philemon make his own decision. \u00a0It is pretty
\nclear Paul isn’t enjoying doing the right thing, sending the letter
\nto Philemon with Onesimus and awaiting the response (hopefully coming
\nback with Onesimus) is hard. \u00a0He doesn’t want to be separated even
\nthat long.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Paul
\ndoes the right thing, and he does it while making every appeal he can
\nto Philemon for the thing he needs. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Now,
\nPaul’s request is not small. \u00a0Onesimus is a slave belonging to
\nPhilemon, and Paul requests that Philemon free Onesimus, recognize
\nhim as an equal in the Body of Christ, and then send him back to Paul
\nas a free person to serve the Body of Christ by accompanying Paul as
\na companion and equal.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

That’s
\nreally living out the line Paul wrote in Galatians. \u00a0\u201cThere is no
\nlonger Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no
\nlonger male and female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus.\u201d
\n(3:28) \u00a0Paul says that now that Onesimus is in Christ, it doesn’t
\nmake sense for him to be the slave of another person with whom he is
\n\u201cone in Christ Jesus.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

This
\nis about as radical of a notion as one could have. \u00a0It upends the
\nentire economic, familial, and societal structure of Paul’s time. \u00a0It
\nis VERY Jesus like. \u00a0It is the reasonable extension of Jesus’s
\nteaching. \u00a0It simply disregards the known hierarchies of the world
\nand replaces them with the bonds of human affection and equality in
\nthe eyes of God.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

This
\nis ignoring everything but the love of God, and appealing on the
\nbasis of that love for things to be different.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

And
\nPaul actually asks for it. \u00a0He doesn’t just write about it, doesn’t
\njust indicate this would be an appropriate way to follow Jesus. \u00a0He
\nasks for it, in real time, because he both believes in it and because
\nhe needs it to be true.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

The
\nemotions and needs behind his request are what make me uncomfortable
\nwith my prior interpretation. \u00a0I’ve been working on becoming more
\nattentive to my own feelings and needs, as well as learning to see
\nand name other people’s feelings and needs. \u00a0I’ve been working on
\nthis for a decade and it makes a difference, but I still have plenty
\nof work to do.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Maybe
\nI’ve been in too many manipulative situations where people aren’t
\nhonest about their needs, or I’ve felt backed into the corner, or
\ndisregarded and unheard. \u00a0Maybe that’s why I’ve read this as if Paul
\nwas trying to manipulate Philemon. \u00a0But right now, it really looks to
\nme like he is laying all his cards on the table, and yet making his
\nrequest one that Philemon gets to decide about. \u00a0He asks, he
\nexplains, he offers what he can offer, but he makes space for
\nPhilemon to do what Philemon will do.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

He
\nmakes a request of Philemon, not a demand. \u00a0Maybe because it seems
\nlike it would be really hard to say no to this request, maybe that’s
\nwhy I read it as manipulative. \u00a0But Paul asks, and doesn’t demand.
\nPaul doesn’t use his authority to decree. \u00a0He ASKS. \u00a0It is almost as
\nif, despite his role as a church leader, he doesn’t hold himself
\nabove other people of faith. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

You
\nknow, this letter is making me love Paul a little more.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

I
\nlove his love for Onesimus, and I love his honesty in really needing
\nOnesimus with him. \u00a0I think I particularly love that last part
\nbecause it is so \u2026 not stoic. \u00a0Paul isn’t sitting in prison saying,
\n\u201cI’m fine, no worries.\u201d \u00a0He is sitting in prison saying, \u201cthis
\nis really much nicer with someone I love around, and I’d like to keep
\nhaving that.\u201d \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Now,
\nmaybe you are thinking to yourself, \u201cwell, sure, someone who is
\nconfined to PRISON deserves
\na little bit of comfort and support.\u201d \u00a0If so, thank God! \u00a0I’m a
\nlittle bit tired of the narrative that people who get confined to
\nprisons somehow stop being human and stop needing basic human things
\nlike edible food and human connection.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

But,
\nanyway, if you were thinking to yourself that it was OK for Paul to
\nask for some comfort in prison in his old age, then I’d invite you to
\ntake the compassion and apply it to yourself. \u00a0You, too, have needs,
\nyou too have the right to try to get them met. \u00a0Regardless of age or
\nimprisonment status.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

When
\nI say needs I am saying things that could fall under categories like
\nautonomy, connection, meaning, peace, physical well-being, and play.
\nI’m not JUST talking about food, water, and shelter although those
\nare part of physical well-being. \u00a0The other categories are ALSO
\nuniversal human needs, ones we ALL have that impact everything about
\nour lives.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

I’m
\nmaking the radical claim that in the letter to Philemon, Paul is
\nshowing himself to be a human being with needs, and that reminds us
\nthat we are human beings with needs too. \u00a0And we, too, have the right
\nto find ways to get those needs met. \u00a0I think that it may be true
\nthat in our society claiming everyone has needs AND a right to seek
\nto meet those needs almost as radical as Paul saying that a slave
\nshould be freed because of equality in Christ.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Now,
\nthis brings me around to Psalm 139 which may or may not have made you
\na little bit uncomfortable. \u00a0Someone asked me in late June what text
\nis used to claim that the Bible is against abortion, and my reply
\nwas, \u201cHuh, I don’t know. \u00a0Cause it isn’t there. \u00a0But maybe they use
\nPsalm 139?\u201d \u00a0After all, verse 13 does refer to a human being known
\nby God even before birth when they say, \u201cFor it was you who formed
\nmy inward parts; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

However,
\nthat doesn’t say what people say it says. \u00a0Psalm 139 also talks about
\nGod knowing what we have to say before the words are on our tongues.
\nThe idea that God knows us before we are born is a way of saying that
\nGod us before we even ARE. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

When
\nI take away the ways Psalm 139 has been misused, I find it rather
\ncomforting. \u00a0God knows us, sees us, is with us, AND LOVES us. \u00a0God’s
\nlove isn’t some generic thing, nor based on how we preform. \u00a0God
\nknows AND love us as we are. \u00a0We have no secrets from God. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

That
\nis, God knows our feelings and our thoughts, and our needs. \u00a0God
\ndoesn’t expect us to be able to pretend away our needs, or push away
\nour feelings. \u00a0God KNOWS them with us, and works with us to get our
\nneeds met and our feelings acknowledged.<\/p>\n

God
\nisn’t asking us to be perfect or stoic, cause God knows what it is
\nlike to be us. \u00a0That’s comforting.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Now,
\nit is possible that some of you are wondering why this matters, and
\nwhy I’m making such a huge point about having needs, and it being OK,
\nand working to get them met. \u00a0Because these are not exactly the most
\nobvious points to make from our scriptures today. \u00a0One piece of this
\nis that discovering that I TOO was a human who also had needs and
\nthat wasn’t WRONG was a pretty big deal to me. \u00a0I knew there were
\nuniversal human needs, sure, but for a very long time I still though
\nI was supposed to be exempt from that, and I’d like to help you let
\nthat go too if you hold that idea.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

But
\nalso, I think there is a lot of fear around being human and having
\nneeds and being \u201cneedy.\u201d \u00a0There is a sense that it is weak or bad
\nor something. \u00a0And I think that does a whole lot of damage to the
\nworld and the church. \u00a0And I think that if we are going to matter to
\neach other, if we are going to be a community who loves each other
\nand helps each other grow, if we are going to matter to the world, if
\nwe are going to be people who meet others where they are \u2013 then
\nwe need to get more comfortable with our humanity and our needs. \u00a0I
\nthink this is a way TOWARDS God.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

To
\nbe specific, I hear in this church profound fear of talking about
\nconflict. \u00a0There is a sense that if we talk about things we’ve
\ndisagreed about, everything may blow up and we will regret it. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/figure>\n

I
\nbelieve that if we brush aside our feelings and our needs, if we
\npretend away our disagreements, if we sweep our history under the
\nrug, it will poison us from the inside. \u00a0I believe that the hardest
\nthings about being a church are the ways that old conflicts never got
\nresolved and keep on bringing new hurts, and if we keep on doing that
\nwe won’t be able to keep on functioning.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

AND,
\nhere is the good news in all of this. \u00a0If we can hold on to our own
\nneeds, and make space for other people’s needs, conflict gets a whole
\nlot less scary!! \u00a0If I have a need for space, ease, and
\nself-expression while you have a need for connection, and efficacy
\nand closeness that could lead us to conflict pretty fast, right?
\nBUT, if instead of blaming me for my need for space or blaming you
\nfor your need for connection we just took those as givens, we could
\nfind some really cool ways to meet both of our needs. \u00a0\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

(Summary:
\nblame is not useful in conflict nor conflict resolutions, but needs
\nthemselves are fine and can help us find win-wins.)<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

I
\nbelieve in a God of win-wins. \u00a0I believe in a God who knows us and
\nlikes us and is at peace with our needs and would like us to be. \u00a0I
\nbelieve in a God who of equality and equity who has no commitment
\nwhatsoever to the hierarchical systems of any age. \u00a0And I believe God
\nis with us, willing and able to work with us in this community and
\nthis church. \u00a0We don’t need to throw our needs to get to God or
\nconnect with each other. \u00a0Instead, like Paul, we can acknowledge what
\nwe need and ask each other for help. \u00a0May God help us find the
\nstrength to be so vulnerable! \u00a0Amen\n<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Rev. Sara E. Baron
First United Methodist Church of Schenectady
603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305
Pronouns: she\/her\/hers
http:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/<\/a>
https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/FUMCSchenectady<\/a><\/p>\n

September 4, 2022<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For years now, the book of Philemon has tickled my funny bone. \u00a0That fact is now making me squirm. \u00a0 … Continue reading \u201cTo Be Known\u201d\tbased on Psalm 139:1-6, 13-18 and Philemon 1:1-21<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[34,38,28,39,33,1581,1579,1577,1265,1580,1578,1484,540,56,1565],"class_list":["post-4510","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-fumc-schenectady","tag-progressive-christianity","tag-rev-sara-e-baron","tag-thinking-church","tag-umc","tag-blame-is-not-ok","tag-church-conflict","tag-feeling-church","tag-first-umc-schenectady","tag-needs-are-ok","tag-needy-church","tag-pandemic-preaching","tag-progressive-church","tag-schenectady","tag-sorry-about-the-homophobic-umc"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4510","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4510"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4510\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4510"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4510"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fumcschenectady.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4510"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}