Loving Your Enemies

September 7, 2025March 17, 2026
by Sara Baron

“Making Space" based on Psalm 139:1-6, 13-18, Luke 14: 25-33

I spent some time this week annoyed at myself for my scripture selections and wishing for a do-over. Particularly relevant, I should share, was that I have been *a little* tender over kindergarten starting this week so a text on hating mothers wasn’t resonating super well. Add to it a Psalm that is beautiful and wonderful and also has been used in the anti-choice movement for decades and I was ready to throw my hands up in the air.

So, I turned to my commentaries, and the Jesus Seminar colors the line about hating families and life PINK meaning it is likely to have been spoken by Jesus. They say,

“The severity of this saying can only be understood in the context of the primacy of filial relationships. Individuals had no real existences apart from their ties to blood relatives, especially parents. If one did not belong to a family, one had no real social existence. Jesus is therefore confronting the social structures that governed his society at their core. For Jesus, family ties faded into insignificance in relation to God’s imperial rule, which he regarded as the fundamental claim on human loyalty.”1

So, while the language itself IS about hating family, and is meant to be shocking, there is something even more going on there. Jesus is taking down fundamental identities, and claiming that God’s love is more than even the things we identify with most.

Then, out of the blue, Helen Ryde died. Helen (they/them), was an organizer for the Reconciling Ministries Network, which is the largest group in the United Methodist Church been working for the full inclusion of queer and trans people in the church and the world. Helen was assigned to the Southeastern Jurisdiction, which is the Southeastern United States and that wasn’t necessarily an enviable area.

Unless you were Helen.

Helen was queer and non-binary, and Helen had a special heart for those who thought Helen and those like them were going to hell. In the days since they died, I watched a sermon they gave where they talked about the people most resistant to change, most set in their ways, most unable to be reached. In organizing language, those people are called “the laggards.” Officially, as organizers, the laggards are to be ignored, because they can’t be reached.2

In their sermon, Helen talked about reaching out anyway.

And, in my experience, that was Helen to the core of their being. My most significant experiences with Helen were in the Love Your Neighbor Coalition Strategy Teams. Let me unpack that. The Love Your Neighbor Coalition is a group of coalition partners including all of the racial-ethnic caucus groups in The United Methodist Church, all the groups that have worked for Full Inclusion of queer and trans people, umbrella justice groups like MFSA, and those working for disability rights, and creation care, along with those seeking justice for Palestinians. The Love Your Neighbor Coalition worked together as one at our United Methodist General Conferences where the rules of The United Methodist Church are written and can be changed. The Coalition has many different teams for General Conferences, and the Strategy team works with committees and the plenary floor to support legislation, oppose legislation, build alliances, organize talking points, name speakers, and work with the boundaries of parliamentary procedure.

So, Helen (and Kevin) and I were on this team and we were preparing for General Conference and there are always these fundamental questions about how we treat those who are working against us. I mean, even that language is kind hard, right? We don’t want to perceive anyone as the enemy or the opposition, but how do we talk about those who were organizing just as hard as we were but for the opposite priorities? And, how do we do it in CHURCH?

We would talk about wanting to acknowledge the fact that everyone was a beloved child of God, even those who wanted to prevent the church from sharing that everyone is a beloved child of God. We would talk about praying for people. We would talk about loving them.

And Helen would be quiet.

And then sometimes we’d talk about our frustrations, about the “how dare they”s about how clearly the people “on the other side” are beloved by God but they are GETTING IN THE WAY of God’s work on earth and it is time to stop them…

And then Helen would speak up.

Because somehow, Helen loved everyone with God’s love for them. Someone said this week that Helen was the best of us in the progressive UMC and that person was right. With Helen around, we could never dehumanize the opposition, we could never forget God’s love for the other side, and we could NEVER consider underhanded strategies counterbalanced the underhanded strategies being done to us. Stuff like that wasn’t possible when Helen was around because this quiet saint wouldn’t allow it. They would remind us about God, and God’s love for others, and that we were in the church, and that we had to model the love even if it meant losing for the time being.

That was Helen.

And sometimes I’d want to contradict them because I wanted to protect my queer and trans friends and family and parishioners but I couldn’t fight with Helen about it because they were vulnerable and engaged with love first anyway.

Helen is the one who, this past May after The United Methodist Church FINALLY shed its homophobic skin, stood up on the floor and spoke FOR letting the churches that disaffiliated from The United Methodist Church BACK in if they changed their minds.3

That’s who Helen was. They’d had their heart changed, and they therefore always left space for others to to change too.

And, on Tuesday, suddenly and in their 50s, Helen died. And for me and many, many others, it was as if the world itself changed colors. In the following days my Facebook contained nothing but tributes to Helen. Helen stood with people in their hardest moments. Helen saved lives. Helen loved. Helen called us to love. Helen changed us. So many of us, it is hard to fathom their death. After Helen’s death, I came back to this scripture, and it had changed.

Because Helen was the best of us in The United Methodist Progressive Movement, because Helen was the one who loved the conservatives the best (and the rest of us too.) They showed that whoever can’t see beyond their own team cannot be following Jesus. Whoever can dismiss another person’s full humanity, isn’t working for the fullness of the kindom of God.

Whoever has limits on their love isn’t doing things God’s way.

All of a sudden the scripture made sense, in the light of Helen’s life.

And, beloveds, this is terrifyingly applicable to us now. There are people we perceive to be on the other team, in a few ways ;). In Helen’s life I hear the echos of Martin Luther King’s teachings that the change we seek in the world is the change that is better for everyone, even the ones currently engaged in oppression.

“hate for hate only intensifies the existence of hate and evil in the universe. If I hit you and you hit me and I hit you back and you hit me back and go on, you see, that goes on ad infinitum. It just never ends. Somewhere somebody must have a little sense, and that’s the strong person. The strong person is the person who can cut off the chain of hate, the chain of evil. … You just keep loving people and keep loving them, even though they’re mistreating you. Here’s the person who is a neighbor, and this person is doing something wrong to you and all of that. Just keep being friendly to that person. Keep loving them. Don’t do anything to embarrass them. Just keep loving them, and they can’t stand it too long. Oh, they react in many ways in the beginning. They react with bitterness because they’re mad because you love them like that. They react with guilt feelings, and sometimes they’ll hate you a little more at that transition period, but just keep loving them. And by the power of your love they will break down under the load. That’s love, you see. It is redemptive, and this is why Jesus says love. There’s something about love that builds up and is creative. There is something about hate that tears down and is destructive. “love your enemies.”4

We don’t seek to change hearts with hate, but with showing the power and depth of love. It is LOVE that changes hearts, even the hearts that seem too brittle to change.

There are people doing harm right now, there are people doing us harm right now, there are people who we experience as the opposition. We need not be naive about this (Helen wasn’t), but it turns out we are still called to love them. May God help us. We need it. Amen

1 The Five Godspels: What did Jesus Really Say? ed. Robert Funk (NY: HarperOne, 1993) page 353.

2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=D64loNQzG94&t=0h4m44s

3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sfIGBgF8SM

4Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, “Loving Your Enemies,” Sermon Delivered at Dexter Avenue Baptist Church

“Loving Your Enemies,” Sermon Delivered at Dexter Avenue Baptist Church

September 7, 2025

Rev. Sara E. Baron

First United Methodist Church of Schenectady

603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305

Pronouns: she/her/hers

http://fumcschenectady.org/
https://www.facebook.com/FUMCSchenectady

Sermons

“How to Love God” based on Leviticus 19:1-2, 15-19…

October 29, 2017February 15, 2020
by Sara Baron

Sometimes
things are complicated, things like trying to build the kin-dom of
God for example. This feels especially complicated when trying to
hold together awareness of many people, with many different needs,
and may varied experiences of oppression. When Rev. Dr. Traci West
was here talking about “Grace and Race” she reminded us that when
we look at things intersectionally, the same people can be both
oppressed and oppressor, in different roles or realities they live.
Actually, it is more that we are all both, which we have to keep in
mind while also trying to get clear on how the systems work that
create and enforce the oppressions, so that we can be part of
changing them.

Sometimes
things are really complicated, like when we try to identify the
driving forces that are important in building a more just society,
and when we look at how deeply embedded how intricate the forces that
keep the status quo in place are. Sometimes things are really
complicated, like when we try to imagine a world without hungry
people, and then we think about all the changes that would require.

And
then, in the midst of all the complications, come the simplest and
clearest commandments of the Bible. They can easily be remembered.
They leave minimal space for interpretation, and there isn’t any
wiggle room in them. Love God, and love your neighbor. Follow up
question: who is my neighbor is easily answered: everyone. Done

The
commandments offer a very simple explanation of the sort of love that
God wants from us: to love God the way God wants to be loved is to
love God’s people. Its all very simple.

Yet,
every one of us who has tried to live these commandments knows they
get very complicated to live out, very quickly. How is it that
something so simple and understandable is also so very difficult?

Thanks
goodness for Leviticus (things you might not have expected to hear –
ever). As it is written in the New Interpreter’s Bible, “Leviticus
19 is one of the grand chapters of the whole book of Leviticus. In
American Reform Judaism it is one of the most quoted and most often
read chapters, especially since it is assigned as the Torah reading
for Yom Kippur afternoon in that tradition.”¹
If you are not familiar with Yom Kippur, it is the Holiest day in
the Jewish tradition, and is focused on atonement and repentance.
The Yom Kippur prayer of atonement is so vast and inclusive that I
find it exceptionally healing, by the time it is over it truly feels
as if the slate of past wrongdoings is wiped clean and we can start
anew.

The
part of the chapter that we are focusing on today reflects on what it
means to love one’s neighbor, and the commandments it contains seem
to clarify what tends to go wrong! By noticing how people are
instructed to do right, we can see what has gone wrong too
frequently.

The
first part of the set of instructions are about how to care for
people who live in poverty, and they are consistent with other
passages in the Torah. As one commentator puts it, this set of
instructions

“seeks
to help poor people by legislating that the three chief products of
agriculture – the grain, the product of the vine, and the fruit of
the trees, are not to be harvested entirely; some is to be left for
poor people to glean. … the Lord is the ultimate owner of
everything; thus the land is a gift from the Lord. If the landowners
are only stewards of the land and all that it produces, there is no
reason to be selfish and stingy. … Disadvantaged persons have a
right to harvest the edges of the fields; they are not to depend on
voluntary gifts alone.”²

In
modern terms, I wonder if the comparison is to be made to welfare,
and other assistance that comes through the Department of Social
Services. The comparison isn’t perfect, gleaning the field was seen
as a human right, however it does compare well to the idea that there
needs to be a way to provide for the basic needs of life for all
people, and that on top of those very basic needs there will be need
for further support. (Please note the video on Sustain and the idea
that those who are getting help from DSS are still struggling to
access basic necessities of life.)

That
idea that all that is, is God’s, and that we are to use it
appropriately is one of the most humbling ideas in our faith. Do we
do it? How well? What would God have us be doing with our resources
that we aren’t doing? How have things gotten to where they are?

The
second bit of instruction deals with truth; there are commands not to
steal, not to deal falsely, not to lie, and not to swear falsely in
the name of God. Apparently these are also common issues in all of
humanity, the temptation to take what isn’t ours or tell untruths for
our own benefit. Their inclusion in this passage is notable though:
to seek a benefit from an untruth means taking that benefit from
someone else. It is not to act as we would wish others would act
towards us.

The
third set of instructions seems to focus on balancing power. In
particular the instructions are against fraud and against stealing.
Then comes yet another instruction that seems to be timeless: “you
shall not keep for yourself the wages of a laborer until morning.”
Laborers were usually living day to day, using the labor of the day
to buy the day’s bread. By keeping it for just a bit longer, the
person who didn’t pay on time would be keeping a person from their
daily food. This has compassion for the poorest workers. Finally,
the instructions condemn taking advantage of a person’s disability
(and I’d expect this expands to any weakness). Specially it says not
to speak harshly to a deaf person nor attempt to trip a blind person.
In summation, this part of loving our neighbors as ourselves seems
to be about not taking advantage of anyone just because we can.

The
fourth part of this set of instructions
worries about “just judgements” and in particular the
availability of justice to people who are poor. This is practically
an obsession of the Torah. It is as if there is something inherent
in human nature that biases people toward partiality, towards giving
the rich and powerful more wealth and more power while taking it away
from the impoverished and disempowered. I don’t much like thinking
about humanity that way, but I can’t see any other reason why the
Bible would spend SO much effort trying to correct for it.
Furthermore, I suppose, that when dealing with justice in combination
with wealth and power, any human could come face to face with a
self-preservation instinct. A wealthy person who is displeased might
be capable of significant harm. Perhaps it is just self-preservation
that makes it possible that all justice systems need constant
reminders and corrections to ensure that justice serves the poor and
the wealthy equally well. It is distributing however, that the
issues that exist today in our nation’s justice system are neither
new nor unique, but reflect a problem with humanity itself. That may
mean it is will be quite reticent to correction.
#Schooltoprisionpipeline #privateprisons

The
final set of instructions about neighborliness in Leviticus 19 is a
bit surprising. It explicitly states that to love your neighbor
means you can’t hate them. That may be a lot harder than it sounds.
It also says that you have to call them to account when their
behavior isn’t loving. That’s definitely harder than it sounds.
Then we’re told not to seek revenge AND not to hold grudges. Then
this part of the passage seamlessly draws itself to a conclusion, the
one we already knew was coming, “You shall love your neighbor as
yourself.”

One
thing seems true, the last few millennia haven’t seen much change in
human behavior. The explicit instructions in Leviticus about what
loving our neighbors looks like hold up well to the test of time.

So
what do we do with these easy to understand, difficult to enact
commandments? We could discuss further instruction, but that hasn’t
yet proven productive. We could offer inspiring stories, but I think
that’s been done enough. I wonder if our time is better spent
considering what holds us back from loving our neighbors, and what we
might do to overcome those barriers.

Now,
this list is just my best guesses (I’m a little sad we don’t’ have a
sermon talk-back so I can hear what you’d add or remove), the things
that make it hard for us to love our neighbors: fear of our own
deaths (“existential anxiety”) and an instinct toward self
preservation, combined with believing in the myth of scarcity;
in-group thinking and fear of others; and finally a lack of love for
ourselves. (If the commandment is to love our neighbors AS
ourselves, it implies we are also supposed to be good at loving
ourselves!) That isn’t a terribly extensive list, I was attempting
to be as clear like the commandments themselves 😉

If
you are willing to take a homework assignment, I’d encourage you to
spend some time considering if the list above feels true in your
experience, and then to consider what things make you more
susceptible to those challenges to loving our neighbors and which
make it easier for you to overcome them and love your neighbors well.
The answers to those questions are pretty important, especially if
we’re all willing to work on them.

For
me, there are two key pieces to overcoming those challenges, two
things that help me truly love our neighbors. The first is quiet
time to soak in God’s love and hear my own inner voice, and the
second is having opportunities to learn about the world and to
connect with people – especially those whose lives have been
radically different from mine. To start at the beginning for this,
when I’m tired, or drained, or anxious, I’m not very loving –
including to myself. While sleep and also good food matter, the key
to keeping myself from getting drained is taking time for my
spiritual well-being. For me, at my best, this means an HOUR a day
spent in contemplative prayer, although the particular form of the
prayer isn’t consistent. When I stop all the doing and just listen –
both to God and myself – I’m more centered, more loving, more
focused, and waaaaaaaaaay less anxious.

At
the same time, one of the great dangers of trying to “Love our
neighbors as ourselves” is misunderstanding what love looks like
for a particular person or group of people. If I don’t understand
the problem, and if I don’t take the time to listen to the one(s)
struggling, then the love I try to share may end up doing more harm.
Also, I really like learning, connecting, and trying to understand
the world and its people.

What
guides you? What helps you be more loving? I know some of you need
forests, others need music, others need exercise – and for many of
you, I don’t know! If you do know what you need to be more loving
the next question is: are you DOING it? I think God would appreciate
it if we spent our time doing the things that help us be more loving
toward our neighbors, in fact, I think that’s how we best love God.
Amen

1Walter
C. Kaiser, “Introduction, Commentary, and Reflections on
Leviticus” in The New Interpreter’s Bible Volume One
, Leander E. Keck, editorial board convener (Nashville: Abingdon
Press, 1994) p. 1131.

2Kaiser,
1133.

Rev. Sara E. Baron

First United Methodist Church of Schenectady

603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305

Pronouns: she/her/hers

http://fumcschenectady.org/
https://www.facebook.com/FUMCSchenectady

October 29, 2017