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  • April 22, 2024
  • by Sara Baron

“God is Good!” by Sylvester Doyer based on Psalm 150.

Introduction: This month of April in 2024 marks the 40 year anniversary of Sylvester’s diagnosis with HIV. In 1984 the diagnosis was seen as a death sentence, and indeed almost everyone diagnosed then died. Somehow, and we don’t know, Sylvester didn’t. In 2007/8 he came very close, and was lying in a hospital bed with 1 T-cell left expecting the end had come. But, somehow, and we don’t know how, it didn’t. He celebrates the love of his long time partner and now husband Denis who was the embodiment of God’s grace pulling him through.

This sharing is in three pieces. First words written decades ago by now Bishop Karen Oliveto for World AIDS day; second a prayer combing the sermon with the baptism we’d shared in just before the sermon; and third the sermon itself. For those in need of a reminder that there can be hope when it seems like hope has fled, may these words of gratitude penetrate your very being. – Pastor Sara Baron

*Call to Worship1“World AIDS Day Liturgies” Karen Oliveto

One:   How have you come to this time and place?

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   How has your heart weathered the many losses of ffriends and l overs?

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   How has your mind grappled with the constant specter of death?

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   How has your soul maintained wholeness?

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s not because of government support;

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s not because of the research and medical communities;

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s not because of the health insurance companies;

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s because of the grace of God.

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s because of the presence of Christ.

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   It’s because of the sustaining power of the Holy Spirit.

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   We’ve come this far because the love of God is made visible through the care of lovers, friends, family, and caregivers.

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   We’ve come this far because nothing, nothing at all can separate us from this love.

Many: We’ve come this far by faith!

One:   We’ve come this far by faith, and we will go even farther, knowing that in every step we take,

Many: God hasn’t failed us yet!

One:   In every burden we carry,

Many: God hasn’t failed us yet!

One:   In every setback we face,

Many: God hasn’t failed us yet!

One:   Our God is a constant presence on which we can lean.

Many: God hasn’t failed us yet!

One:   We can trust in God’s presence.

Many: God hasn’t failed us yet!

One:   Alleluia! Amen!

Many: Amen and amen!

Prayer Before Sermon

We come before you Creator of all, thanking you for allowing us to see another day. Thank you for allowing us to plant our feet on solid ground and start on our way. We thank you and acknowledge that you didn’t have to allow us to wake this morning, but you did, and we thank you. In the mist of all that is happening in the world today we cry out Father I stretch my hand to thee and you hear us. As a reminder that you are ever near and ever listening to us Lord you are constantly giving us signs of your loving presence. This morning, we thank you for putting in our midst such a sign in the little one Koa, who we welcome into your family this morning through his baptism. We pray for his parents that they maybe a source of strength and guidance for Koa so that as he grows, he may know nothing but caring and love from them and everyone around him. Amen

Sermon

We all have a tendency when times get rough to seek comfort from
anywhere and anyone around us. If you are spiritual, we usually turn to the man upstairs.

And I was no different when in those early days I didn’t know if I would be around to see the next day. That’s when I remember growing up with a Catholic and Southern Baptist background, I found myself seeking and drawing comfort more from my Southern Baptist
background.

I recall going to church with my dad who was Southern Baptist and
there was a group of women called the Mother Board who usually would stand and sing one of those old gospel songs that they called Dr. Watts song. There was this one elderly mother who would lead the
song but before she would start, she witness, testify to and about the
goodness and greatness of God.

I am here this morning to join mine witnessing and testimony to hers and to shout as she shouts God is good. Back then the words she was saying didn’t make much sense till later. When in those darkest hours your soul cries out seeking comfort, I remember just lying there sometimes and listening to my soul cry out in the words of that
old gospel song, “Father, I stretch my hand to thee. No other help I know. If Thou withdraw Thyself from me Ah, where shall I go.” Looking back as my soul cried out, “Father, I stretch my
hand to Thee ….”, even in those darkest moments he was listening
because sitting next to my hospital bed was Denis, he put him there saying don’t give up, never, never, never give up.

My soul would cry all the louder, “Father I stretch my hand to Thee….”
There in the room working through the medical team and everything else would be that voice, “don’t give up.” The louder I’d cry, “Father I stretch my hand to Thee…..”, the louder that voice would become.

I’m here to tell you, he showed himself to me in those around me but
especially Denis who would get up in the morning walk the dogs; go to work all day; come home walk the dogs and then come up to the hospital and be that voice that whispered “don’t give up; never, never,
never give up.” They would let him sit sometimes way pass visiting
hour.

My soul would cry out even more but it changed the song and cried out “I Love The Lord He Heard my cries, And pitied every groan; Long as I live, when troubles rise, I’ll hasten to His throne” the song goes
on to say “My God has saved my soul from death and dried my
falling tears; Now to his praise I’ll spend my breath and my remaining years.” My heart this morning is full of joy, full of gratitude and thanksgiving. Last month my doctor reminded me that I’ve been
living with HIV/AIDS now for 40 years this month.

There were those days when I wasn’t sure I was going to be here, but my soul cried out “Father I Stretch my hand to Thee”, and he heard my cry. I’m here this morning to tell you He didn’t have to wake me up this morning, but He did. He didn’t have to plant my feet on solid
ground, but He did. He heard my cry and let me see another day and I am here to thank Him. My soul this morning cries out even louder “I love the Lord; He heard my cry and pitied every groan.” So,
I’m here this morning to join my story, my testimony to that elderly mother and to let you know even in those darkest of times the soul cries out and it’s heard.

There is a song that sums up how I feel today and every day.

Now my soul cries out How I got Over.
How I got over
Well, how I got over
Well, my soul look back and wonder
Don’t know how I got over (How I got over)
How I got over
I’m gon’ thank him for how he brought me
Well, I’m gon’ thank him for ho
w he taught me

Oh, thank him for how he kept me
I’m gon’ thank him ‘cause he never left me
I’m gonna thank him for heart felt religion
I’m gonna thank him for a vision
I’m gonna sing hallelujah
Oh, shout all my trouble over
I’m gon’ thank him (Thank him for)
All he’s done for me
Thank him for all he’s done (
He’s done)
For me

Amen

1Karen Oliveto “World AIDS Day Liturgies” in Shaping Sanctuary edited by Kelly Turney, 2000, page 140-1.

First United Methodist Church of Schenectady 
603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305 
http://fumcschenectady.org/ 
https://www.facebook.com/FUMCSchenectady

Sylvester (left) and Denis (right) on their wedding day in 2013.

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“Quiet Resurrections” based on Jeremiah 31:1-6 and Matthew 28:1-10

  • April 4, 2021
  • by Sara Baron

It is really easy to
miss the point of Easter by focusing too much on what happened ~2000
years ago.  There is extensive debate among people who debate such
things about what FORM Jesus’s body took after resurrection, which is
a clear indication that a lot of people miss the point.  However it
was that Jesus’s disciples transformed from the frightened men who
ran away from the cross to the leaders of the developing church who
faced their own persecution with courage, and continued Jesus’s
ministry in their own lives – that thing that happened was
resurrection. They talked about it as Jesus returning to them,
meeting with them, guiding them, explaining things to them.  I have
no idea where the line between metaphor and reality, memory and
presence was in that, nor do I think it matters.  

I think it matters
that they became convinced that not even the Empire’s power of death
– they greatest power the Empire had – held any sway over them.
I think it matters they moved from self-protection to courage.  I
think it matters they moved from scattering to consolidating their
relationships.  I think it matters they moved from the amygdala
response of “danger! Protect self!” to the pre-frontal cortex
questions of “how do we tell the stories of Jesus so others can
hear them?” and “how do we distribute food fairly despite
cultural differences?” and “how much do we take on and how much
do we train other people to do?”  They, themselves, moved from the
fear of death to the fullness of life.  That’s resurrection.  

And the key to all
of it, is that the power of resurrection that moves us from the fear
of death to the fullness of life is a CONTINUAL gift from God that
enriches ALL of our lives, and empowers us in our darkest moments.

Truth be told
though, given the rather hugeness of the original story, everything
else can pale in comparison.  And because of that, I think we
sometimes miss the power of resurrection in our lives, because we’re
looking for things that are bigger and flashier than how God mostly
ends up working.  So, I offer this example from my own life, of what
I’d like to call a “quiet resurrection.”

When I was a kid, in
gym class, we were expected to test for the “Presidential Fitness
Test” every year, and every year I failed the running portions.
Alas, I told myself, “I’m no good at running.”  As I got older, I
continued to fail every running test my physical education teachers
put in front of me.  Eventually my narrative switched to, “I’m just
not in good shape.”  Sure, I did lots of physical activity all the
time, but CLEARLY I was failing, and CLEARLY that was an indication
that I was “not in good shape.”

That story stuck
with me.  By seminary I jogged regularly, but since it was slowly,
and since I still got winded, I told myself “I’m just not in good
shape.”  Later, as I’d climb mountains with friends, I’d be
noticeably the most winded and make jokes about “being in bad
shape.”  It had become part of my identity.

Five years ago,
after Easter, I got a cold.  Truthfully, this is common enough for
pastors and church workers.  The intense work of trying to make Holy
Week and Easter meaningful experiences for our churches means a drop
in adrenaline at the end of it, and then people get sick.  That time,
the cold became a cough.  Normal enough.  A month later I went to the
doctor because the cough just wouldn’t subside.  Sure enough, I had
bronchitis.  But that wasn’t the whole story.  When the PA was
listening to my lungs, “something sounded wrong, more wrong than
just bronchitis.”  After a serious of tests, my doctor named what I
experienced as “exercised induced asthma” and gave me an inhaler
to use before cardio exercise.

At first, this just
felt like a new way of saying I was broken, because I was so deeply
in that frame.  But, what followed was, for me, miraculous.  Suddenly
my workouts were… productive.  I got BETTER.  Also, I could
breathe!  And ever so slowly it occurred to me that the issue hadn’t
been my own failure, a lack of exercise, or not trying hard enough –
even though I’d been telling myself that for decades.  It was simply
physiological.  In fact, it hadn’t even been that I’d been “out of
shape” for all those years.  Rather, I had an undiagnosed condition
that impaired me.

It has taken a
shockingly long time for all of this to penetrate my self talk.  I’d
gotten so used to thinking of myself as an utter athletic failure,
that I’d failed to notice that the goal of adult fitness is to have
ways to move your body that are FUN and also promote health.  When it
comes to that standard, I’m pretty good at being athletic. (Huh,
never said THAT before.)

I’ve heard from many
other people over the years about the impact of diagnosis that feel
similar to this, including in mental health.  Varieties on the theme
of “oh, it isn’t just because I wasn’t trying hard enough” or
“there is a NAME for what I’m struggling with” or “other people
find this hard too, I’m not alone.”  (Of course, not all diagnoses
feel this way, of course.  But some do, and that’s what I’m talking
about.)

So, maybe for some
of you, it will make sense when I say that for me, having a little
inhaler open my lungs so I can exercise, and having that experience
free me from a hurtful narrative about myself, was a significant
experience of resurrection.  It freed me to be try more things, be
more playful, enjoy life more!  Those things matter.

The stories we
tell ourselves about ourselves can be impediments to the rich full
lives that God wants us to live, and they can be impediments to our
responses to God’s calls on us to build the kindom.  Easter is
the story of resurrection, the story of God’s power of LIFE over
death.  We’re so busy telling ourselves and God that “I can’t”
based on stories that aren’t true, that we miss God responding, “Oh
honey, you CAN.”  (God may use different endearments with you.)

Many times in life a
skill or story is important to getting us through a moment – but
the SAME skill or story becomes an impediment to growth later on.
Switching around the way we see something can change our whole
experience of it.  Reframing an experience, or a story can make space
for God’s transforming work in our lives.  

The challenge quite
often is that we don’t see our own framing, which makes it hard to
notice it and consider adapting it.  This is one of the reasons that
therapists are so useful, they’re particularly trained to noticing
and pointing out dated framing.  This is also a reason why we talk to
friends and family – because outside perspective can make a huge
difference in helping us see!  And, I think this is a reason why
contemplative prayer is such a gift in people’s lives.  As we develop
the skills to be quietly present to God and ourselves, as we
disengage from the frantic pace of life, as we allow our thoughts to
slow down – we are MAKING SPACE for grace to move and show us new
ways.

These little, quiet
resurrections may not seem like enough, but that’s only from a human
perspective.  When God is part of one small thing, and another small
thing, those two small things together add up to more than their
parts.  (Aka, God is willing to override the rules of math in God’s
commitment to grace and the kindom.)  When many little resurrections
are added together, lives become more whole, and as lives become more
whole there is more and more space for that abundant life to expand
to more and more people, and more and more of the kindom is built.
What God is up to is definitely enough.

After all, it was
only one resurrection 2000 or so years ago, and we’re still seeing
the rippling effects.  Thanks be to God.  Amen

April 4, 2021

Rev. Sara E. Baron
First United Methodist Church of Schenectady
603 State St. Schenectady, NY 12305
Pronouns: she/her/hers
http://fumcschenectady.org/
https://www.facebook.com/FUMCSchenectady

  • First United Methodist Church
  • 603 State Street
  • Schenectady, NY 12305
  • phone: 518-374-4403
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  • email: fumcschenectady@yahoo.com
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